Wild storms raging
Strong tides crashing
Slowly drowning
Each gasping breath
A little less enthusiastic
As hope sinks
To the sea bed
Clouds draw in
Darker each day
Emptiness grows
Light extinguised
Thunder crashes; lightening relieve
Hollow soul
Takes flight above
A Smile can mask
A thousand truths
Yet cannot conceal
Pain behind your eyes
I look, I see, I feel
You lie, “all’s good”
Your doing fine
Hurt too hard to bear
Shake within your voice
I notice and I hear
Muted response
Silence deafens
Spoken fear a waste
Heartbreak, sorrow, grief
The bitterness I taste
Dimples pronounced
Smile spread wide
Jolly tones
Laugh magnified
Truth brushed aside
Until door closes
Gasped breath
Time frozen
Lost all strength
Slow, painful death
Falling, sinking
Deflation
Lost all hope
Joy starvation
Suffocation
Beauty within lines
Spirit defined
Life lived
Despite heart adrift
Every loved ones
Mark stains
Carried everywhere
Legacy share
True, frail
Mysterious trail
Mapping voyage
Joyous
Passion, pain, glory
Retelling a
Story
Of each life touched
New lines construct
Carry forth
Given life; rebirth
Upon new face
Your grace
Searching; for answers
Without knowledge of the question
Exploring options
Someone must have a suggestion
Researching; treatment
For an illness undiagnosed
Flicking through pages
Every promising gateway closed
Exploring; own self
One day to truly comprehend
Missing who I am
No longer wanting to pretend
Dead eyes
Give away the game
I already see me in them
Some days I question
What’s really more damaging?
Do they stand a better chance Without my impression
Fake smile
Held for wider world
Unsustainable each moment;
We share together
Learning through observation
Imbedding negativity
Masking all life’s pleasure
Gift you
Shot at happiness
By removing overbearing
Dark cloud I impose
Wish grief could be avoided
Lesser of unfortunate evil
Sacrifice for you to grow
Mind on repeat
Scratched record
Over and over
I want to die
Every silenced moment
Episode of fear
When the lights turn out
I want to die
Between false smile
Exaggerated laugh
Magical moments
I want to die
How to express
Make it crystal clear
Can’t voice the words
I want to die
Want to be saved
Whilst wishing you could
Help me achieve
My want to die
They branded you selfish
I think you were brave
No longer willing;
To be a slave
Damaging those you love
Dark clouds contagious
Releasing their noose;
Feels courageous
Mentally engrossed with
Preparing to die
Tired and ready;
To say goodbye
Every isolated moment
An opportunity
To seek atonement
How to feel alive?
Does anyone see me;
Appreciate the pain inside
Each sharp kitchen knife or razor blade
A vessel of release
For blood to cascade
Self-hatred and pain
Escape; instant relieve
No possibility of restrain
You tell me I have Insight
If I know I’m not right
Does that make it all OK
Mean I have enough fight?
Aware I’m going crazy
Life has become hazy
Does that make me capable
I’m really just lazy?
Voice hoarse, shouting out for aid
Every card’s been played
Reverting back to ‘I’m fine’
Back to the old charade?
giggles&tears 